Mindful Ramblings
Unfairman's Articles In Humor
February 22, 2004 by Unfairman
I am currently a carryout at the local grocery store. Go ahead, laugh it up. Here I sit, degree in hand, bagging groceries at a store in the town where I grew up. But I do have a greater purpose in life...in 4 months time, while you're still sitting here at your computer reading the inane thoughts of someone you don't know I'll be in a tropical paradise, offering to create a better life for the people of a small nation. The grocery gig is just something to help pass the time and put a little b...
February 22, 2004 by Unfairman
I am currently a carryout at the local grocery store. Go ahead, laugh it up. Here I sit, degree in hand, bagging groceries at a store in the town where I grew up. But I do have a greater purpose in life...in 4 months time, while you're still sitting here at your computer reading the inane thoughts of someone you don't know I'll be in a tropical paradise, offering to create a better life for the people of a small nation. The grocery gig is just something to help pass the time and put a little b...
February 22, 2004 by Unfairman
I wish I was a morning person. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that I AM a morning person, I just hate waking up. The unstrained silence of the first few hours after the sun rises fit in perfectly with my view of how the world should exist. I used to work Security in college, midnight to 8 a.m. I was okay with the difficult hours, because I got to see the sun rise without having to rise myself. People watching is gratifying in the morning; you get to see people as they really are, before w...
February 22, 2004 by Unfairman
I wish I was a morning person. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that I AM a morning person, I just hate waking up. The unstrained silence of the first few hours after the sun rises fit in perfectly with my view of how the world should exist. I used to work Security in college, midnight to 8 a.m. I was okay with the difficult hours, because I got to see the sun rise without having to rise myself. People watching is gratifying in the morning; you get to see people as they really are, before w...
April 15, 2004 by Unfairman
So, I was just talking to one of my friends on IM. She said she'd "brb" because she had to put her puppy out. When she came back, I asked her what kind of puppy it was. She said "it's a little huskie." I said "Well, maybe you're feeding it too much." I don't care who you are, THAT'S funny.
April 15, 2004 by Unfairman
So, I was just talking to one of my friends on IM. She said she'd "brb" because she had to put her puppy out. When she came back, I asked her what kind of puppy it was. She said "it's a little huskie." I said "Well, maybe you're feeding it too much." I don't care who you are, THAT'S funny.
March 22, 2004 by Unfairman
My mom got entered into a drawing last week for a $2500.00 cash give away. She had to go back up to the casino tonight to see if her name was going to be drawn. Normally, I hate going to casinos, and my mom knows this. She asked me to come with her, and I obliged, thinking I may win enough money to buy the coveted "Ninja Gaiden". I did not...but my mom gave me the money to gamble, so it's not like I really lost out. If only someone would donate to "Chris's Ninja Gaiden Fund". Oh wait, what...
March 22, 2004 by Unfairman
My mom got entered into a drawing last week for a $2500.00 cash give away. She had to go back up to the casino tonight to see if her name was going to be drawn. Normally, I hate going to casinos, and my mom knows this. She asked me to come with her, and I obliged, thinking I may win enough money to buy the coveted "Ninja Gaiden". I did not...but my mom gave me the money to gamble, so it's not like I really lost out. If only someone would donate to "Chris's Ninja Gaiden Fund". Oh wait, what...
March 21, 2004 by Unfairman
My Sophomore year of college, I had a Somalian roommate named Omer. He was a character, and this is but one of the many hilarious stories we have of him. Omer would always eat really weird food...being from Somalia and what not. One of the things he ate like every day for 2 months was some ground up hamburger and spices that he kept in a greasy grocery bag at the bottom of the fridge...he ate it with his fingers. And he made the most GROTESQUE eating noises of anyone I've ever met, even Pe...
March 21, 2004 by Unfairman
My Sophomore year of college, I had a Somalian roommate named Omer. He was a character, and this is but one of the many hilarious stories we have of him. Omer would always eat really weird food...being from Somalia and what not. One of the things he ate like every day for 2 months was some ground up hamburger and spices that he kept in a greasy grocery bag at the bottom of the fridge...he ate it with his fingers. And he made the most GROTESQUE eating noises of anyone I've ever met, even Pe...
February 24, 2004 by Unfairman
Sorry folks, but I have to write the words to my new favorite song here. It's by Strong Bad. He writes about what he would do if he could make his town different. It comes straight from the heart, and that's what makes it special. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeelllll.... The Poopsmith he could talk *HEL-LO* And Marzipan would rock And The Stick would be this big old tree That would try to eat everyone except The Cheat and me [Strong Mad] And me! We'll see! And the King of Town would be undergr...
February 24, 2004 by Unfairman
Sorry folks, but I have to write the words to my new favorite song here. It's by Strong Bad. He writes about what he would do if he could make his town different. It comes straight from the heart, and that's what makes it special. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeelllll.... The Poopsmith he could talk *HEL-LO* And Marzipan would rock And The Stick would be this big old tree That would try to eat everyone except The Cheat and me [Strong Mad] And me! We'll see! And the King of Town would be undergr...
May 26, 2004 by Unfairman
> WARNING unfairman is radioactive. Wear protective clothing at all times. Username: From Go-Quiz.com
May 26, 2004 by Unfairman
> WARNING unfairman is radioactive. Wear protective clothing at all times. Username: From Go-Quiz.com
May 19, 2004 by Unfairman
First of all, i'm gonna complain how much "Van Helsing" sucked. Please, people, don't give these morons your money. Yeah, Hugh Jackman is ripped, yada yada, Kate Beckinsale is hot...but...that's about it. Characters? 2 dimensional, at best. Jackman, an otherwise promising actor, delievered his lines like 4 day old coffee, not that he had much to work with. Beckinsale still has to prove herself, I think, and a crappy Transylvanian accent isn't the way to do it. The movie totally contradicted ...